i have been missing him and the moment very much

i had been tired and sad for long time,why i have to meet him?to know him?to accpet him?to be friend with him?and to destroy a relationship that i hope so much?i very sad even after a year but just like thing happen yesterday,i can't control myself to cry for it without let him know this.maybe this is better for him to forgot me and let everything goes away...